4 Ways to Find a Sugar Daddy - wikiHow (2024)

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Last Updated: January 29, 2024Fact Checked

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   Know what you're looking for. Before you start looking for a sugar daddy, you should know what you're looking for. This will help you narrow down your search and to be more clear about your demands right from the beginning. You can make a list of the qualities you'd like the sugar daddy to possess and another list of all of the things you'd like him to pay for. There's no shame in that -- he is a sugar daddy, after all.

   • Decide what kind of sugar daddy you're looking for. Do you want someone who is under forty, or over fifty? Should he be divorced, wanting to date multiple people, or even married? Do you want someone who wants to spend a lot of time with you or just a man to whisk you away on the weekends?
   • Decide what you want the sugar daddy to do for you. Some women just require a flat fee -- like $1000 or $2000 a week in exchange for their companionship, some fun times, and usually some lovemaking. Or do you want to be compensated mostly through fancy dinners, exotic vacations, and being treated to fancy and exclusive events?
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   Check out websites for finding sugar daddies. Don't be shy -- if a sugar daddy is what you're after, then you should join a website for finding sugar daddies. These sites allow you to be clear about what you want, and to easily find men who are looking for something similar.

   • Be clear about what you want. Let the men know what kind of relationship you're looking for.
   • Post photographs that are appealing, but not too provocative. You want the men to think you're sexy while taking you seriously.
   • Talk about what you have to offer. Don't just focus on what you need, but let the men know that you're fun, exciting, mysterious, or that you just love a good time.
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   Check out regular online dating sites. If you feel too shy or embarrassed to check out the traditional websites for finding sugar daddies, or you don't want to be so obvious about what you want, you can check out regular dating websites, like OkCupid.com, or eHarmony.com, and try to find a man who will give you the money and gifts you want.

   • You can use filters to find the right man, such as looking at his salary bracket or his occupation.
   • You can also browse the profile of a man to see if he fits your needs -- if he lists expensive hobbies like boating or vacationing in Europe as his interests, appears to be dressed in very expensive clothing, and clearly has expensive taste, he may be the sugar daddy for you.
   • You should also look into what the man is looking for -- see if he wants a woman he sees as his equal, or if he wants to treat a woman to a good time in exchange for her company.
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   Ask your friends. Don't be afraid to ask your friends if they can set you up with a sugar daddy. You can phrase this differently if you feel more comfortable about asking less directly. It's likely that at least one of your friends will know a rich man, whether it's from work or their outside interests, who is looking for someone he can take care of. If you send out a feeler, someone should definitely know of the perfect man for you.

   • Ask your friends to set you up on a date, and tell them to be frank about your demands. You don't want to be set up with a man who is looking for his soul mate if all you want is a sugar daddy.
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   Go to places where you can find rich men. If you're too shy to check out the online dating scene or to ask your friends if they can set you up with a sugar daddy, you can go out and try to hunt for him yourself. Take your friends to a bar or restaurant in the rich neighborhoods in your town, and catch the eye of an older and obviously rich-looking man.

   See Also

   Ways to Write a Very good Sugar Daddy Profile - Gordon Hartman Family FoundationCrafting the Perfect Response When Your Sugar Daddy Asks What You're SeekingI'm a 'sugar baby' who gets paid $500 a date — here's what it's really like to date sugar daddies and get cash, gifts, and 5-star hotel staysHow Much Money Do Sugar Babies Actually Make? I Tried to Be One... - THE BALLER ON A BUDGET - An Affordable Fashion, Beauty & Lifestyle Blog

   • You can even go out of your way to go to a place where rich men are known to be. You can even take a girl trip to the Hamptons, or other places where rich men spend their vacations and see if you find anyone who appeals to you.
   • When you're looking for men, dress up nicely, but not too provocatively. You want the men to take you seriously and not think of you as a one-night stand. Your relationship with the sugar daddy should last a lot longer than that -- at least long enough for you to get what you want.
   • Check out cultural places that are likely to be frequented by rich men, like museums, opera houses, or art galleries. If an art gallery or museum is having a special occasion night, like a co*cktail party, make sure to be there with bells on.
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   Be persistent in your search. Finding a sugar daddy takes time. Don't be frustrated if your search doesn't lead you to the right man right away. You can try a mixture of looking online, asking your friends, and going out into the wilderness to find the sugar daddy of your dreams for the best results. If you know what you want and are confident about finding it, then the sugar daddy will eventually find his way into your life.

   • The beauty of looking for a sugar daddy is that you can date multiple people at once. Remember to keep your options open as you keep looking.^[1]

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1. 1

   Be clear about your needs. Your sugar daddy will appreciate it if you set the terms of the relationship early on so there's no confusion. If you want a weekly salary or expect him to pay some of your expenses, like your rent, let him know so that he knows exactly what you need from the beginning. If you only want to meet him once or twice a week, then tell him this so he doesn't expect more.

   • Being clear about your needs will also help establish the terms of the relationship. This will ensure that you're both looking for the same thing.
   • If you want the freedom to see other people while you're dating, you can make this clear from the beginning, too.
   • Don't feel shy about telling him what you want -- he'll appreciate your honesty and may even find it refreshing.
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   Be attentive to your looks. You don't have to be a hot twenty-year-old with DD breasts to appeal to a sugar daddy. Sugar daddies are looking for women of all ages, shapes, and sizes, so don't feel self-conscious if you're over forty or if your figure doesn't resemble a Barbie doll's. What's important is that you spend time maintaining the looks that you do have by showering daily, styling your hair, and wearing flattering and appealing clothing.^[2]

   • Take the time to style your hair and put on some make-up. You could find a sugar daddy at any time and want to look your best when you do.
   • You don't have to look like a p*rn star to appeal to a sugar daddy. Many sugar daddies prefer the natural look.
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   Be self-assured. If you want to appeal to a sugar daddy, you should be confident and self-assured, and ready to call the shots. He may be feeling shy about being a sugar daddy or unsure about how to proceed, and he'll appreciate it if you know what you're doing and aren't shy about asking for the things you need. Hold your head high, smile proudly, and introduce yourself with pride.^[3]

   • There's a difference between being self-assured and bossy. Let the sugar daddy tell you what he's thinking, what he wants, and how you can help. Don't try to be so self-assured that you ignore his needs completely.
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   Be independent. A sugar daddy isn't looking for a life partner or a woman who will do all of his laundry and grocery shopping for him -- he probably has a maid for that anyway. He's looking for a woman who is fun and exciting, but who also has her own life, interests, friends, and plans when he isn't around. If you seem clingy, obsessed over his schedule, or like you always want to be around, he'll be turned off fast.^[4]

   • Don't meet with the sugar daddy more than two or three times a week -- if you try to see him more than that, he'll think you're getting attached.
   • Avoid sleeping over too much if you can. If you start sleeping over at your sugar daddy's place all the time, it'll start to look like you want to move in and stick around.
   • Be open about your plans. If you're having a night out with your girlfriends, let him know. He'll only want you more if he's a little jealous. If you're both clear about the fact that you're in an open relationship, tell him when you're going out on a date with someone else. This will only make you look more independent.
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   Be sexy. Sugar daddies want sexy women who will fulfill their needs. If you really want to find a sugar daddy, then you should look and act sexy as much as possible. Look sexy by wearing sexy clothes, wearing make-up to create smoky eyes, and wearing some sexy lingerie in the bedroom. You can act sexy by licking your lips, touching your sugar daddy just enough to turn him on, and sending him sexy texts or even talking dirty over the phone.

   • If you really want a sugar daddy, you should have some sexual experience. Sugar daddies want women who are comfortable in the bedroom. You should know what you're doing and should be prepared to give him what he needs.
   • You don't have to wear provocative clothing to be sexy -- just wear something that compliments your figure and makes your sugar daddy want you more.

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1. 1

   Stay mysterious. If you want your sugar daddy to keep wanting you, then you should stay mysterious. If you have to go, don't always tell him where you're going. If you don't respond to his calls for a day, don't go into a big explanation about what you were doing -- you were just busy living your own life. Don't tell him about every little thing on your mind and don't go into detail about your deepest wishes and needs. You can reveal a little bit about yourself at a time, but always leave him wanting more.

   • Don't give him a planner with your schedule on it. Let him wonder about all of the things you're up to when you're not with him.
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   Be positive and fun. Sugar daddies are looking for women that they can have a good time with. They're not shelling out cash to be with a woman who is negative or always whining and complaining. If you tend to have negative thoughts, try to keep those to a minimum when you're around your sugar daddy and save them for your real friends. Keep things light and positive by laughing often and talking about the things that make you happy and the things that you're excited about instead of the things that get you down.

   • Whenever you catch yourself saying something negative, counter your statement by making three positive comments.
   • Try to laugh as much as you can. Sugar daddies want women who are having a good time.
   • If you're having an emotional day or feel like crying, don't dump all of your emotions on your sugar daddy. Call up a good friend instead.
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   Keep things exciting. If you want to keep your sugar daddy, then you should keep things fresh by always keeping him on his toes. Don't do the same thing every weekend, even if you always go out to an expensive restaurant. Instead, mix things up by asking him to take you boating, give you a tennis lesson, or whisk you away on an expensive vacation.

   • If you do the same things together all the time, your sugar daddy may begin to get bored with you. Make sure you do one new thing together at least once every week or two.
   • Keep things exciting in the bedroom too. Use your time with your sugar daddy as an opportunity to try out some of your new moves.
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   Avoid domesticity. The quickest way to turn off your sugar daddy is to make him feel like you're ready to shack up and sign a marriage certificate. He's with you because you're fun, adventurous, and exciting -- not because you love making home-cooked meals or ironing his shirts. Avoid sleeping over, spending too much time with him, or taking on any wifely tasks if you can, or a red flag will go up immediately, and he'll want to end the relationship.

   • As soon as you can tell he feels uncomfortable that you're getting too close, just pull back.
   • Don't call him your boyfriend and don't make jokes about your wedding, either.
   • Don't introduce him to your friends or family unless that's really what he wants, or things will begin to feel too serious for him.
   • Avoid talking about anything too far in the future, unless you're just planning your next vacation.
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   Don't get attached. If you really just want to benefit from the riches of a sugar daddy, then don't get too attached to him. He's not your boyfriend or long-term material -- he's someone who you have a good time with, a man who provides you with the financial benefits that make your life easier and more fun. Don't start planning your wedding, coming up with your kids' names, or scheduling your life around his busy schedule. Remain who you are, keep pursuing your own interests, and you'll avoid getting hurt.

   • Don't contact him all the time when you're not together. Just plan your once-or-twice-weekly meetings and let him know when you're on your way.
   • Don't spend your time apart wondering what he's up to, or when you'll see him again.
   • Don't ask him about other women in his life or get jealous if he even mentions another woman's name.
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   Know when to move on. If you've been with your sugar daddy for a long time, you may be wondering if it's time to break it off. There are a few good reasons for doing this: you may see that he's too attached to you, you may worry that you're too attached to him, or you may both just be bored with each other. Another reason for moving on is that either you or your sugar daddy have found someone who you really like, or even love, and want to pursue a relationship with that person.

   • Once it's over, it's over. Be clear and calm about ending the relationship and try to end things on a good note. If all you wanted was a sugar daddy, you'll be able to find another one in no time.
   • If the sugar daddy rejected you, don't get hurt. It happens all the time -- sugar daddies tend to get bored and want to move on, and it probably has nothing to do with you.

   See Also

   Creating A Sugar Baby Profile: How To Get The Best Sugar Baby Profile

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1. 1

   You're fine taking money in exchange for relations. You're getting paid to like someone and act like their partner. There is nothing wrong with this, but you need to be honest with yourself about what you're getting into.

   • You need to be comfortable being upfront with your man. If you're too passive, or just take the money without questions, you're at risk of being taken advantage of.
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   You understand the risks of financial dependency. That money doesn't come with no strings attached. You're going to be expected, in some way, to do things for him as well, or else the money will run dry quickly.

   • You will, in some way, become dependent on your sugar daddy to keep your lifestyle going.
   • If you have your own source of income, and just use him for amenities and luxuries, you can stay more independent.
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   You're okay leading men on. You should, of course, be honest with your sugar daddy from the get-go. But even if you're honest, you're going to be leading him on. You need to act sexy and mysterious to earn your keep. No matter what the "rules" are, chances are good he's going to want more. You're going to have to be fine cultivating this while knowing that he isn't getting more.

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   You know you can keep your emotional distance. Many sugar daddies know fully well what they're getting you into. They start with gifts and money, but the ultimate goals are not always on the table. When you give someone that much power over you, you have to have trust in them. But sugar daddies, in general, aren't the most immediately trustworthy people. You have to keep your head, and heart, on a swivel. At the same time, you're just there for the money, so don't feel like you don't have any power in the relationship either.

   • This is, in many ways, a business transaction. Keep it that way.
   • If you're looking for deep or meaningful connections, don't get a sugar daddy. Any relationship built on payment is unlikely to lead to a true and deep connection.
   • Silly as it sounds, sugar daddy relationships are very rarely like the plot of Pretty Woman. Don't let the dream of "free" money blind you from the realities of cash-for-sex relationships.

   

   Gain clarity on sugar relationships. "I'm brand new to the sugar baby scene, so having a clear list of dos and don'ts is super helpful for me. After a relationship with one daddy didn't pan out, I was feeling kind of lost. But this article helps me see what good communication and reasonable expectations should be. Now I feel ready to try again with someone new!" - Elizabeth L.

   Use guidelines to find an attractive match. "Thanks to tips here, I just started seeing this amazing new sugar daddy! He is crazy hot. The advice on figuring out what rich guys want, being upfront about my own needs, and staying fun and flirty totally worked. I felt sexy and empowered making this arrangement, not judged or shamed. So excited to see where it goes!" - Nelly M.

   Build confidence in unconventional relationships. "As someone new to sugar dating, I liked how this article talked straight and set clear ground rules. When we're open about wants and boundaries, it removes stigma and empowers both people. I can enter this mutually beneficial relationship as my own boss with confidence instead of shame. Super helpful!" - Bellulah J.

   Learn to spot and avoid risky sugar daddies. "This article reminded me that safety has to come first with sugar dating. Now I know what red flags to watch for — guys who seem jealous, controlling, or want domestic commitments. Following the smart tips here will help me enjoy the perks while filtering out shady daddies. Appreciate the real talk!" - Julia S.

   Did you know that wikiHow has collected over 365,000 reader stories since it started in 2005? We’d love to hear from you! Share your story here.

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